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Al-Kildamuddah, has become the head of Iraqi security forces. Some say, “HappyDays Are Here Again!”, while others think, “It’s Sadaam Shame!”

“Culture Warrior”Bill O’Reilly, one of the first passengers scanned by the new airport X-Ray machine, was taken into custody after they found a stick up his ass!

There was a mass Tivo malfunction during the Academy Award ceremonies. As soon as the four hour show was over, instead of stopping, Tivo replayed the event from the beginning…over and over again! Millions of people who fell asleep during the boring event…kept waking up and asking, “How many times is Martin Scorsese going to win for best director?”

After winning an Oscar for best documentary on Global Warming and saving energy, Al Gore peddled his bicycle around the corner to a parking lot where his turbo charged, stretch limo waited to take him home to his mansion!

JFK conspiiracy theorists are having a field day since new color footage has emerged of Dealy Plaza on Nov. 22, 1963. There are several frames that show the grassy knoll with a young O.J. Simpson, shoving a nine iron with a telescopic site, into a golf bag!

“Dancing With The Stars”, seems to be scraping the bottom of the Big Dipper for this years line up of b-list celebrity contestants. Heather Mills (soon to be Mrs. Ex-Paul McCartney) was the first to be disqualified after producers discovered she was a professional! It seems that Ms. Mills has been dancing around the truth for years!

A Preist, a Rabbi and a radical Muslim cleric walk into a bar, and are shot by a gay minister, for appearing in a joke too stupid to even finish!

Paris Hilton’s perfume, “Vogue On The Outside, Vague On The Inside”, has been outselling Lindsay Lohan’s “Firecrotch” by a ratio of 69 to 1.

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Animal Planet’s newest show, “Animal Idol”, another “American Idol” spinoff, has become the networks biggest hit! Simon Cowell’s cat, Wesley, a judge on the show has been considered to be an even harsher critic than Cowell is.

When an American Idol contestant sucks, it’s no big deal, until pictures show up! http://poponthepop.blogspot.com/2007/02/antonella-barba-naked-pictures.html

Copyright 2007 by Artie Wayne

Special thanks to Sharon Link for the picture of Wesley Cowell

Thanks to Don Williams for the expression, “It’s Sadaam shame”

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A last minute coat is given to the replica of the Oscar, that stands outside of the Kodak theater in Hollywood. Shouldn’t someone give it a last minute pair of pants as well?

It’s Academy Award Sunday Morning, a time I used to wake up in anticipation of the evening ceremonies. My favorite catagory has always been The Best Song In A Motion Picture, and have been right in my choices most of the time. This is one of those dismal years where there are no standouts among the nominees. Most are songs I not only don’t want to hear again, but songs I didn’t want to hear all the way through the first time!

I understand that movie songs are used to establish a time frame, a mood, to evoke a feeling that may or may not be apparent on the screen…but I expect more from an Academy Award Winning Song! Shit! Where is a “Moon River”, “Tammy” or “Raindrops Keep Fallin’ on My Head”? How many songs have the sentimentality of recent winners, “Lose It” by Emenim or “It’s Hard Out Here For A Pimp” by 36 Mafia?

Here’s a list of nominees for best original song written for a motion picture 2007

“I Need to Wake Up” from “An Inconvenient Truth”
(Paramount Classics and Participant Productions)
Music and Lyric by Melissa Etheridge

“Listen” from “Dreamgirls”
(DreamWorks and Paramount)
Music by Henry Krieger and Scott Cutler
Lyric by Anne Preven

“Love You I Do” from “Dreamgirls”
(DreamWorks and Paramount)
Music by Henry Krieger
Lyric by Siedah Garrett

“Our Town” from “Cars”
(Buena Vista)
Music and Lyric by Randy Newman

“Patience” from “Dreamgirls”
(DreamWorks and Paramount)
Music by Henry Krieger
Lyric by Willie Reale

This year, my assistants Whoppy , Streaker and I pick Beyonce and, “Listen”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JRLGz4AnFYU

We’ll all find out tonight!

Copyright 2007 by Artie Wayne

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People ask me how I remember events that happened so long and write all about them as if they were happening today! Ever since I was a child I have been aware that everything we see, hear, feel and smell is recorded and forever stored in our brain, especially if they’re accompanied by a strong emotion.

From time to time, when we experience a similar emotion, a long…long lost file somewhere in our brain unlocks, and we involountarily experience a flashback that makes us ask ourselves, “Now why did I think of that?”

I’ve discovered ways that I can access those files whenever I want… through deep meditation techniques , self-hypnosis, and now extra virgin coconut oil! If you’d like to know how to do it e-mail me at artie_wayne@yahoo.com and I’ll tell you. I’ll also send you an mp3 where I talk you down to a deep meditative state…All at No Charge!

All I ask is, that if it works for you as it has for so many others,please get back to me with your story and allow me to include it in my articles and my forthcoming book ( anonomously if you prefer)

Thanks and regards, Artie

 

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Mike Stoller, Elvis Presley and Jerry Leiber

Sometimes visiting Artie Wayne On The Web, is like going to the Turf Bar and Grill, after a long, hard day at the Brill Building! You never know who you’re gonna’ meet…but you know you’re gonna’ have a good time!

The last time I saw Mike Stoller, was at a quiet dinner with my late manager Marty Machat. Mike kept us spellbound with his tale of having been rescued from the Andrea Doria, the luxury liner that was shipwrecked in 1956!

The last time I saw Jerry Leiber, was at a little sushi bar, in Hollywood. He had me, and my friend, Patti Dahlstrom laughing so hard…that we forgot that we had an opening to go to at the Troubador!

The first time I became aware of Leiber and Stoller, the songwriter/ prodcers, was in 1956 when I saw their names on an Elvis Presley Record, “Hound Dog”. It wasn’t long before I considered them the equivelant of a “Name Brand”, and would buy one of their creations without even hearing the song! I became impressed with more than their songs and productions, however, when I realized how much they helped define the image of the artists they worked with!

Although Elvis had dozens of hits in his remarkable career, 30 years after he passed away, whenever there’s a tribute to him you”re sure to hear “Hound Dog” and “Jailhouse Rock” by Mike and Jerry. Both songs are full of humor and rebellion…and embody the Spirit of Elvis!

Until I saw their photos, I assumed they were “Negroes”, which African-Americans were called at the time. Their output of hits with deep roots in West Coast Rythym and Blues, The Robins, The Clovers and “Big” Mama Thorton was legendary but it wasn’t until their smash hits by the Coasters, “Young Blood” and “Searchin'”, did they start to leave their indelible mark on the Pop Music Market!

Although they produced many hits over the years for the Coasters, Drifters, Ben E. King, Stealers Wheel and Peggy Lee, the most memorable recordings they made are the songs they wrote or cowrote for those artists. These signature songs include, “Stand By Me”, and “I Who Have Nothin” for Ben E. King, “Yakity-Yak” and “Charlie Brown” for the Coasters, “Love Potion Number 9″ for the “Clovers”, “There Goes My Baby” and “On Broadway” for the Drifters, as well as, “Is That All There Is? for Peggy Lee.

I never knew Mike and Jerry well, but I knew their songs intimately…and there was never a time that I’d be around them when I didn’t hope that a little of their “Magic” wouild kinda’ rub off on me!

Copyright 2007 by Artie Wayne

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Britney, Brooke, Halle, and Cameron from their new film, “Bald Is Beautiful”

Britney Spears, bald on top and bald at the bottom, was mistaken for a member of the Hare Krishna at LAX airport last night. When passengers started dropping change into the coffee cup she was carrying, airport security took her into custody for panhandling. When she was released, the police apologized and allowed her to keep the $26 she had collected, providing she’d buy a hat and some panties!

EXCLUSIVE PHOTOS! MATTHEW McCONAUGHEY ON TOP OF ZAC EFRON AND VANESSA HUDGENS! http://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2009/01/04/matthew-mcconaughey-on-top-of-zac-efron-and-vanessa-hudgens/

Inspired by the successful reunion of the Police, last week at the Grammys, The Archies have gotten back together, except for Jughead who is still at large after being featured on “America’s Most Wanted”.

FIRST PHOTOS! PIGS IN LIPSTICK MARCH ON WASHINGTON! http://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2008/09/10/exclusive-photos-pigs-in-lipstick-march-on-washington/

 Nancy Pelosi, the Speaker of the House, has taken several meetings with Eric Rice, one of the creators of Second Life, the most popular alternate reality site on the Internet. Rice wants a law to protect the rights of humans who visit Second Life and want to marry one of the virtual characters they design. He also wants to give them the power to delete any of the virtual children they may accidentally create!

In-And-Out, the fast food giant, has had a 22% increase in revenue in their Hollywood locations, since adding “A Stint In Rehab” to their menu.

EXTRA! EXTRA! KRISTEN BELL BLOWS! EXCLUSIVE PICTURES
http://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2006/11/12/it-was-women-and-children-firstthe-day-the-bubblegum-bubble-burst/

The CEOs of all broadcast and cable networks met secretly yesterday to figure out how they’re going to fill up airtime once the Anna Nicole Smith story plays out.

After airline passengers were left stranded on a snowbound runway for up to eleven hours, without food and water, Jet Blue vowed it would never happen again! Now, every passenger, upon boarding, is issued a roll of Lifesavers and a package of M&Ms.

This year, with African-American nominees dominating the Oscars, Martin Scorsese Nominated for directing,”The Departed”, is determined not to get snubbed by the Academy again! The Italian dirctor on “Entertainment Tonight” sporting dreadlocks and a deep salon tan said,”‘Bout time we brothers and sisters finally be getting our props!”

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The Motion Picture Academy of Arts and Sciences, Has always kept it’s final tally of votes for each Oscar winner a well guarded secret. For the first time, the Academy has revealed how the winner is determined in the event there is a tie. It also explains why God is usually the first one thanked by the winners!

Copyright 2007 by Artie Wayne

EXCLUSIVE! THIS MAY BE THE LAST TIME YOU CAN SEE LINDSAY LOHAN AND PARIS HILTON ON TOP OF BRITNEY SPEARS! http://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2006/12/04/exclusive-photos-lindsay-lohan-and-paris-hilton-on-top-of-britney-spears/

CRACK IN A STAR ON HOLLYWOOD BOULEVARD…BRITNEY EXCLUSIVE!
http://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2006/12/01/theres-a-crack-in-a-star-on-hollywood-boulevard-quick-call-your-publicist/ 

Because you’ve been good, now you get “NOOKIE”S TOP CHRISTMAS AND “HAUKKAH VIDEOS for FREE!” includes Adam Sandler’s “HANUKKAH SONG”, the Full Original Version of “A Charlie Brown Christmas” , JUST ADDED JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE, CARRIE UNDERWOOD, TOBY KEITH, BON JOVI SINGING “THE HANUKKAH SONG!” and MUCH, MUCH MORE! http://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2006/12/22/nookies-top-holiday-video-picks/

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Although I’ve known Trade Martin since he was one of most in demand session guitarists in New York, I didn’t work with him very often because he was always booked up! In addition to being an excellent musician, part of why he became so popular among producers in the 60’s and 70’s was the fact that he was constantly singing and playing in Rock and Roll Bands in the tri-state area and he not only knew how the everchanging hits on top 40 radio sounded…he knew how they were constructed.

The first time I worked with Trade, was in 1964, just before I took my first trip to London. I had become bored with the American Music scene and became enamoured of what I heard coming out of the UK. I had written a song with Ben Raleigh (“Tell Laura I Love Her”, “Wonderful, Wonderful”) and Danny Jordan (The Detergents) called, “When She Was What She Was”, which was more of a Gerry and the Pacemakers song than a song for Dion.

When I heard Chip Taylor and Al Gorgoni’s production of a song Trade wrote for Evie Sands, “Take Me For A Little While”, I was overwhelmed by his songwriting abilities which equaled his musical skills!. When we sat down to plan out my session and I played him my song and he added chords and changes I was only hearing on English hits. The tracks turned out great but I was disappointed in my own vocal. When I came back from England I put my vocal on again, this time with a pronounced English accent and sold the master to Coed records where it was released under the pseudonym Terry Boyd. This was the same label where Trade was signed, that released his classic “That Stranger Used To Be My Girl”.

Although he’s written and scored films, has been nominated for “Clios” for his work in commercials, and received praise for his productions of B.B.King, including the Grammy winning, “Live at San Quentin Album”, his passion for self-expression remains at an all time high as he continues to perform regularly and write and record on a daily basis.

When we reconnected a couple of weeks ago, I became more accutely aware of the part he and his guitar played in the hit making process of some of greatest record producers of our time including Phil Spector, Leiber and Stoller, Bert Berns, Jeff Barry and Ellie Greenwich, Carole King and Gerry Goffin, Jerry Ross, Jerry Wexler and Burt Bacharach. I didn’t know Trade played on, “Cherry, Cherry”, By Neil Diamond, “Chapel Of Love” by the Dixie Cups, “Twist and Shout” by the Isley Brothers, as well dozens of others he casually rattled off.

As I scrambled to turn my tape recorder on, I started to ask him questions about what I thought every member of Spectropop might want to know.

AW- How did you first get together with Phil Spector?

TM- I was working at the time with Jeff and Ellie, Carole King and Gerry Goffin, Barry Mann and Cynthia Weil and Phil Spector’s contractor heard about me and called me up. He said Phil wanted to meet me, so I made an appointment to see him up at Liberty records. You recorded for Liberty didn’t you?

AW- (Laughs) Yeah, briefly. That’s where I met Phil too…he was on the A+R staff.

TM- The contractor told me to bring my guitar to the meeting, so I brought my white fender guitar.

AW- Did you bring an amplifier…or did he have one?

TM- No…no ( laughs) You could hardly hear the sound, but if you listened close enough you could hear it. I didn’t know it at the time, but Phil was a guitar player himself and he studied with Barney Kessel.

AW- Phil played the guitar solo on the Drifters record, “On Broadway”

TM- Right! I caught him playin’ in the studio one day…you know a lot of jazzy stuff. I was a Jazz oriented guitar player myself.

AW- Tell me more about your meeting.

TM- I remember him sitting behind a big desk, and I was on a couch across from him. Our whole meeting wasn’t longer than 6 or 7 minutes. As I pulled out my guitar, he asked what kind of stuff I liked to play? I told him that I played in a night club, and I knew all the solos by Scotty Moore, Carl Perkins…guys like that. At that point he asked, If I knew the intro to “Maybelline” by Chuck Berry? I smiled, and started playing it. He said I’d be hearing from his contractor.

AW- Which you obviously did.

TM- I played on almost every session he did in New York. He found out that I had this D28 Martin Herringbone Dreadnaught acoustic guitar and after he heard it, he always wanted me to play it on his sessions. I specifically remember one session I played it on it, it was at Mirasound with Brooks Arthur engineering. Phil usually used 2 or 3 pianos on his dates. on this one, Carole King was on an upright piano, as I remember, Paul Griffin was on a grand piano and Jerry, Phil’s contractor, was on another.

AW- And what song was this?

TM- “He Hit Me And It Felt Like A Kiss” by the Crystals

AW-Wow!

TM- Phil wanted me to play 16th notes all the way through the track, fortunately I play the drums, so I was able keep that rythym up! I used to sit right in front of Gary Chester who played drums on most of Phil’s dates.

AW- Gary’s one of the most innovative drummers I ever worked with…you could recognize him on every record he played on!

TM- He’s the best…and what a nice guy!

AW- I’ve been to a couple of overdubbing sessions of Phils but never a tracking session. Tell me more…who were the other musicians?

TM- There was Carl Lynch on Electric Guitar, Billy Butler on another electric and percussionist, George Devins.

AW- And on bass?

TM- Bob Bushnell on electric and Russ Savakus or Dick Romoff on stand up. Phil always liked to use two basses on his tracks.

AW- I worked with all those guys, but I never knew that they were the foundation of the “Wall of Sound”…Great musicians and incredible positive vibes! I heard that once a track was done, Phil would have the musicians double it…to give it his signature sound.

TM- No…not on any sessions I’ve been on. I’ll tell you what he did though…

(To Be Continued)

Copyright 2007 by Artie Wayne

The complete interview with Trade Martin will appear exclusively on Artie Wayne On The Web and Spectropop in about a month. I honestly didn’t plan to do any more interviews for a while, but after reconnecting with Trade, I realized how much of Pop history he’s been part of…and it would be a shame not to document it.

I’m going to be talking with him again on Tuesday at noon, If you have any questions you want me to ask him, about Phil Spector or any of the legends he’s worked with, you can e-mail me at artie_wayne@yahoo.com

To reach Trade Martin http://trademartinmusic.co

Thanks to Dave Monroe for sending Evie Sands performing ,”Take Me For A Little While” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XZTG-5brNII

For More On Phil Spector http://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2006/08/16/the-scoop-on-richard-baskin-and-phil-spector-with-a-cherry-on-top/

For Spectropop http://spectropop.com

To get back to Artie Wayne On The Web http://artiewayne.wordpress.com

Special thanks to Jeff Rubin for reconnecting me with Trade.

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Brian O’Neal and The Bus Boys, “It Must Be Saturday Night!”

The acomplishments of the Black architects of Rock and Roll, Little Richard, Chuck Berry, and Fats Domino have always been underappreciated and still largely remain underacknowledged. So tell me, what chance does an African-American Rocker have competing in today overwhelmingly “White” Rock and Roll World?

Every now and then a Black artist will make it through like Sly Stone, Rick James and Lenny Kravitz whose music has elements of early Rock and Roll…but actually is a fusion of Rock, Funk, R+B, punk, and/or Psychedelia which makes it easier to pigeonhole and fit into an acceptable radio format.

I’ve actually heard some white kids say, “What do Black people know about Rock and Roll?” What do they know? SHIT…We invented it! Although I enjoy groups like U2, All-American Rejects, Fall Out Boy, and Green Day, the Rock and Roll of today is more about angst, alienation, sexual obsession and other dark topics than it was at the beginning, when it celebrated the joy of life!

Brian O’Neil and the Bus Boys have brought that joy back and over the years have remained true to the original spirit of the genre! What I’ve heard, so far, of his “Future Retro” music has entertained me, made me smile and makes me want to hear more!

I first met Brian in 1982, when I was hosting Genghis Cohen, a top Hollywood restaurant. Brian was riding high with the hit single “The Boys Are Back In Town” from Eddie Murphy’s “48 Hours” (which will be out on DVD in April) and became a regular customer. When I started creating wearable art, he bought a hand-painted graffitti shirt for his girlfriend and asked me to add, “A Hard Man Is Good To Find!”. His sense of humor, is indicitive of what you’ll find in his music…but “That’s like tryin’ to tell a stranger bout Rock and Roll!” you can download “It Must Be Saturday Night!” from the forthcoming Bus Boy Album, FREE for the next two weeks! http://busboys.com

“Come On…Get On…The Bus Boy Bus! They’re servin’ up a real good time!”

Copyright 2007 by Artie Wayne

To go back to Artie Wayne On The Web http://artiewayne.wordpress.com

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