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Binky is horrified after discovering he’s only one pair of chromosomes away from being human!

The world is reeling after a cell phone video released on the internet shows a silver haired Elvis Presley, celebrating his birthday in Brazil with his balding pals, Jimi Hendrix and Jim Morrison. Can a “Return of the Kings” tour be far behind?

Role model Paris hilton, in an exclusive interview with Entertainment Tonight, admits she’s not promiscuous and only has sex when she’s in a relationship. Later, she confides in People magazine that she had 112 “relationships” in 2006!

At his long awaited press conference today, President Bush, was outraged that the entire press corp laughed when he proposed enlisting the aid of Jedi Warriors and Storm Troopers to help end the war in Iraq. When informed by veteran reporter Helen Thomas that they all were ficticious characters from “Star Wars”, Bush smirked and said, ” Next thing you’ll try to tell me is that Spiderman isn’t real! “

Shock Jock, Howard Stern just received an 83 million dollar bonus from his bosses at Sirius radio. It’s reported that he gets $100 every time he curses or tells an off color joke.

Several technicians at NASA were fired today after it was revealed that they were using the extreme close-up lens on the Hubble telescope, which circles 380 miles above the earth, to photograph Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan exiting cars in Hollywood!

A team of Iraqi sharpshooters, rifles loaded with silver bullets as well as local villagers armed with wooden stakes, are said to be watching Saddam Hussein’s unmarked grave 24 hours a day…just in case the execution didn’t “take”.

The noxious fumes that hung over New York earlier this week was deemed to be only the fallout from the raging feud between Donald Trump and Rosie O’Donnell.

Congress has unanimously approved the use of convicted Taliban as human missles. The terrorists, ironically, will have bombs strapped to them and dropped without parachutes over Somalia, to help wipe out their Al Qaeda comrades!

The video of the week submitted by Patti Dahlstrom should give you a smile! http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1734043

Copyright 2006 by Artie Wayne

 

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Jurassic Park “Who’s Next?”…and the infamous Jimi Jammin’ Jacket!

I was really excited last sunday when Artie Wayne on the Web reached the 50,ooo mark, representing all the people who have blogged on since we started five months ago. Today, one week later, we’ re over the 100,000 mark! What was it that brought everyone here? The brilliant reporting, the exciting stories, the hilarious jokes? Or was it those pictures of Britney, Paris and Lindsay? http://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2006/12/04/exclusive-photos-lindsay-lohan-and-paris-hilton-on-top-of-britney-spears/

http://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2006/12/01/theres-a-crack-in-a-star-on-hollywood-boulevard-quick-call-your-publicist/

Anyway, I want to remind you that you have until next friday December 15, 2006 to enter our caption contest and a chance to win a hand painted design on the back of your own denim jacket, worth up to $1000. Just click on to http://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2006/12/03/win-a-piece-of-wearable-art-worth-1000/

Sebastian Prooth’s brilliant video of Alan O’Day and the late Johnny Stevenson classic, “Rock and Roll Heaven”, featuring Ronny Kimball, has been played thousands of times on eleven internet sites in the past 24 hours! If you haven’t seen it scroll down to my previous post and click onto Elvis’ triangular eye!

If you like to read about some of my “Brief Encounters”with some of our late rock heroes including Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, Jim Croce just click onto http://artiewayne.com/pg9.html


In 1971, When I was general professional manager of Warner Brothers music, the late Johnny Stevenson played me a song he just recorded, “Rock and Roll Heaven’. I thought the chorus was a smash, but didn’t care for anything else! I suggested that he collaborate with Alan O’Day (“Undercover Angel”, “Angie Baby”) and turn it into a tribute to Rock Stars who have passed away.

In 1974 the Righteous Brothers recorded it and took it to number one! Since then we’ve lost so many more of our heros that it was time for an update of the lyric. Alan O’Day worked on it for months, then he went to Nashville and made a demo with Ronny Kimball. I e-mailed a copy of the demo to my friend, director and producer, Sebastian Prooth for an opinion. This morning he surprised us with this brilliant video he made!

You can reach Sebastian Prooth at http://sebrt.com
You can reach Alan O’Day at http://alanoday.com
Artie Wayne http://artiewayne.com

Of course, it was impossible to mention every Rock Star who has passed away in the song and the video, but I would like to start a list to honor as many as we can on this blog. I would like to begin with my friends Jim Croce and Bobby Darin, who were mentioned in the Righteous Brothers record. Then we have Bill Haley (Comets), Rick James, Marvin Gaye, Carl Perkins, Rick Nelson, Johnny Burnette, Dorsey Burnette, Sam Cooke, John Bonham (Led Zeppelin), Keith Moon (The Who), Richie Valens, Luthor Vandross, Eddie Cochran, Wilson Picket, Tammi Tyrell, John Phillips (Mamas and Papas), Mama Cass (Mamas and Papas), Frankie Lyman, Peter Ham (Badfinger), Howlin’ Wolf, Muddy Waters, Chas Chandler (The Animals), Mike Milward (The Fourmost), Stu Sutcliff, Brian Jones (The Rolling Stones), Keith Relf (The Yardbirds), James Jamerson, Dennis Wilson (Beach Boys), Carl Wilson (Beachboys), Big Mama Thornton, Bert Berns, Curtis Mayfield, Otis Blackwell, Ben Benay, Lowell George, Van McCoy, Floyd Cramer, Ersel Hickey, Bobby Sheen (Bobby Soxx and the Blue Jeans), Mickey Most, Jim Capaldi (Traffic), Gene Vincent, Tony Williams (The Platters), Joe Brown, John Lennon, George HarrisonJohnny Johnson, Ray Peterson, Janet Vogel (Skyliners) Jan Berry (Jan and Dean), Freddy Garrity (Freddie and the Dreamers), Eugene Record (Chi-Lites), Chuck Willis, The Big Bopper, Jimmy Radcliffe, Bill Orr (the Cars), Doris Troy, Joe Tex, Joe Simon, Duane Allman (Allman Brothers), Billy Preston, Joe Strummer (The Clash), Del Shannon, Barry Cowsill The Cowsills), Bill Cowsill (The Cowsills), Joey Ramone (Ramones), Stevie Ray Vaughn, Link Wray, David Blue, Danny Gatton, Zal Yanovsky (Lovin’ Spoonful), Phil Seymour, David Blue, Shel Silverstein, Graham Parsons, Jerry Garcia (Grateful Dead), Bobby Fuller, King Curtis, Buddy Knox, Johnny Preston, Eddie Cochran, Kirsty MacColl, Jimmy Bailey, Maurice Gibb (Bee Gees), Richard Tee, Hank Ballard, Tony Romeo, Jessie Belvin, Ed Townsend, Sterling Morrison (Velvet Underground), Jackie Wilson, John Fred (Playboy Band), Hank Ballard, Bobby Hatfield (Righteous Brothers), April Young, Arthur Conley, Dick St. John (Dick And Dee Dee), Timi Yuro, Lou Rawls, Paul Atkinson (Zombies), Johnny Bristol, Francine Barker (Peaches and Herb)Maurice Gibb, Chris Curtis, Shirley Goodman (Shirley and Lee), Johnny Cymbal,The Duchess, Little Eva, Mickey Most, Billy Preston, Irving Green, Morris Levy, Nick Drake, Barry White, Laura Nyro, Frank Zappa, Barbara George, Arthr Lee, Baker Knight, Eddie Kendricks, Tony Jackson (Searchers), Link Wray, Kevin Gilbert, Michael Hutchence (INXS), Milan B. Williams (Commodores), Adam Faith, Johnny Wilder junior (Heatwave), Richard Barrett, Arthur Lee (Love), Syd Barrett (PInk Floyd) , Arthur Conley, Gene Pitney, Freddy Garrity (Freddie And The Dreamers), Shannon Hoon, Ray Peterson, Denny Doherty (Mamas And Papas), Bruce Gary (The Knack), Freddie Marsden (Gerry and the Pacemakers), Dennis Peyton (Dave Clark 5), Ruth Brown, Ahmet Ertegun, James Brown, Bill Pinkney (Drifters), Harry Nilsson, Dusty Springfield, Florence Ballard (Supremes), Shannon Hoon (Blind Melon), Barbara Acklin, Ron Miller, Donnie Brooks, Paul Griffin, David Ruffin, Freddy Scott, Hank Medress (Tokens), Dan Fogleberg, Ike Turner, Al Gallico, Mike Smith, Wilson Pickett, Bo Diddley, Norman Whitfield, Alan Gordon, Levi Stubbs ( 4 Tops) , Estelle Bennett (Ronettes)…

To view a RARE VIDEO OF BO DIDDLEY IN HIS PRIME!                        http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M8PIbrMh6vo&feature=related

Copyright 2008 by Artie Wayne

If you have any names that you would like me to add to the list you can click onto comments (below) or e-mail me at artie_wayne@yahoo.com You may submit up to three names to add to the list, which I will post.

This morning I interviewed my long time friend, Kenny Schaffer, long-ago publicist for the Left Banke, Jimi Hendrix, Alice Cooper and Jerry Garcia. This is the guy who also invented the wireless microphone and the wireless guitar in his spare time! The critics are raving about TV2Me, his latest invention, which allows you to bring your local cable or satellite programming with you, at cable-TV quality, anywhere you travel in the world! http://tv2me.com

As we took a breather from the interview, catching up on old times and laughing, I joked about my becoming the Andy Rooney of Rock and he told me a story about the man himself.

“You know that I suggested two stories to Andy Rooney, both of which he actually did. My favorite one was the one about “blow-in cards” that keep falling out of magazines. I suggested that they block the drainpipe of my bathtub, fall all over the floor, etc.. I proposed to him that everybody should collect all these freaking drop-in cards until they have a pile of 30 or 50, then walk over to the post box and dump them all in (blank, of course). And since they’re return postage paid, the assholes who put these things in the magazines will eventually get the idea — in their pockets, possibly the only part of their anatomy used for thinking.

Rooney did the story – but wimped out – stopping just short of suggesting people dump the unsigned cards into the post box — (probably some intervention from “standards and practices” at CBS.)

Kenny…All I can say is let the revolution begin!

You can reach Kenny Schaffer at http://nutcom.com

You can reach Artie Wayne at http://artiewayne.com

You can reach Andy Rooney at http://whothehellknows.com

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