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Defying a court order, we refuse to apologize to any one in the media who have run stories from, “If It’s On The Internet, It’s Gotta’ Be True!” as real news . Most of you understand that we fabricate the foolish and celebrate the insane…if you think otherwise that’s your problem!

We were proud to be spoofed last season on the Emmy nominated comedy “30 Rock”. When Tina Fey questions Tracy Morgan about some dubious information he found online, he responds with wrongteous indignation, “If It’s On The Internet, It’s Gotta’ Be True!”

Now decide for yourself…with the top twenty stories of the year and remember, ” If It’s On The Internet, It’s Gotta’ Be True!”

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It was revealed after a mix-up at the DNA lab, that Larry Birkhead is actually the father of Scary Spice’s baby, while Eddie Murphy is the father of Anna Nicole Smiths’ Dannielynn, and Knut the baby polar bear.

When a reporter asked President Bush if he knew he was wearing one brown shoe and one black shoe, Bush looked down and said, “Of course, I even have another pair like it at home.”

83 year old, Bob Barker retired host of “The Price Is Right” is speaking out on his romance with 21 year old starlet, Lindsay Lohan. “ I know that there’s a big age difference between us and having sex could result in death, but if she dies…she dies!”

Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and trauma complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch. The gravesite was piled high with flours as Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded.

When Chelsea Clinton, asked a returning US Soldier about fear.He said that there were only three things he was afraid of: “Osama, Obama, and Yo’ Mama.”

While packing to go to jail, Paris Hilton and her mother were watching the Republican “Mass Debaters” on TV. When it was candidate Mitt Romney’s turn to speak, Paris exclaimed, “He doesn’t sound like a moron!” Her mother smiled and replied, ” I said he was a Mormon…not a moron, dear”

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Millions of fans wept, as Sanjaya , from”America Idol ” shaved his head to play the brother of a bald Halle Berry, in the new film “Nappily Ever After”

After vigorously and relentlessly promoting the use of, “One square of toilet tissue per sitting”, Sheryl Crow shouldn’t have been surprised when she put her hand on Karl Rove’s shoulder during the Washington Correspondents dinner and he screamed, “Don’t touch me!”

At his long awaited press conference today, President Bush, was outraged that the entire press corp laughed when he proposed enlisting the aid of Jedi Warriors and Storm Troopers to help end the war in Iraq. When informed by veteran reporter Helen Thomas that they all were ficticious characters from “Star Wars”, Bush smirked and said, ” Next thing you’ll try to tell me is that Spiderman isn’t real! “

First Lady , Laura Bush is still trying to explain the ounce of Columbian grass, customs officials found in her bra, when she returned to the U.S. today!

Although citizens of Washington, D.C. are now legally allowed to carry concealed weapons, night clubs are still frisking their patrons. If they don’t have a gun, the management issues them one…just to keep the odds even!

The Food and Drug Administration has issued a warning for consumers to watch out for fake male contraceptive pills that are flooding the market. The real pills don’t have a colorful candy shell with an “M” stamped on the outside!

Al Gore celebrates the anniversary of the Internet…which he invented 16 years ago!

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After losing to Binky, on the UK ’s wildly popular TV show, “Are You Smarter Than A Monkey?”, Prince Charles is still walking around with his hand stuck in a coconut shell! So far, no one has the nerve to tell him that if he lets go of the peanut inside, he’d be able to pull his hand out easily.

Britney Spears, bald on top and bald at the bottom, was mistaken for a member of the Hare Krishna at LAX airport last night. When passengers started dropping change into the coffee cup she was carrying, airport security took her into custody for panhandling. When she was released, the police apologized and allowed her to keep the $26 she had collected, providing she’d buy a hat and some panties!

Last night when people tuned in to “Dancing with the Stars” to see if “the leg would fall off”, they weren’t disappointed! They were surprised , however, that it was host’s Tom Bergeron’s leg that fell off, not Heather Mills’ as expected.

If you wonder why Simon Cowell, has been so nice? “American Idol” producers, tricked him into thinking he was having his teeth cleaned, when actually he was being spayed and neutered!

A fire this morning at Paris Hilton’s Apartment, was quickly contained, but not before it destroyed her entire library! Unfortunately, both of her books were lost, her autobiography and one more…which she hadn’t finished coloring.

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Finally, In a surprise news conference, Donald Trump announced that he was ending his feud with Rosie O’Donnell. He said , “I want to say I’m sorry Rosie…I’m sorry, you’re such a bitch!”, then turned and walked away.

Tivo, the home recording system, has a new feature called S.O.S. short for Save Our Sanity! As deftly as it it removes commercials from recorded programs, Tivo will automatically remove any mention, picture, or campaign ad of any Presidential candidate running for office, until 24 hours before the actual voting begins.

Happy New Year from all of us at Artie Wayne On The Web! 

Copyright 2007 by Artie Wayne

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They’re all here, JUSTIN BIEBER, Taylor Swift, MICHAEL JACKSON, REINDEER SINGING “WHITE CHRISTMAS”,  Nat “King”Cole, Bing, NEW ARCHIES, Elvis, Rudolf, JOSH GROBAN FROM NOEL!, Neil Diamond, Band-Aid, “THIS CHRISTMAS”, NEW ALVIN AND THE CHIPMUNKS, ALAN O’DAY,  Jingle Cats, Carpenters, NEW JULLIANNE HOUGH, Brenda Lee, PAUL EVANS, Tony Orlando and Dawn  and so much more! HOURS AND HOURS OF FAMILY FUN with the original Christmas music clips and new Christmas Video animations!

When Whoppy and Streaker were little more than kittens I sat down with them on their first Christmas Eve and sang Christmas songs on my guitar. Ten years later they’re playing Christmas songs for me that they found on the Internet! Sound outrageous? Not as outrageous as some of the the videos they found!

Here are the Singing Reindeer and “White Christmas”, by Clyde McPhatter and The Drifters, one of my aunt Wan’s favorites, which my friend Publicist/ Writer Gary Stromberg, sent me as a Christmas card. http://gpsinformation.info/main/merryxmas.swf

JUST ADDED! MICHAEL JACKSON”S NEWLY RE-MASTERED “LITTLE CHRISTMAS TREE” from the new JACKSON FIVE ULTIMATE CHRISTMAS ALBUM

Growing up in the 50’s, Irving Berlin was one of my greatest influences. He wrote other classic songs like “Easter Parade’, “True Love”, “Always”, and “God Bless America”, but none ever touched as deeply as his classic, “White Christmas”. When I started in the music business, I remember going from door to door in 1650 Broadway, trying to get my songs published. One day I walked into Irving Berlin Music, which occupied a suite of offices on the second floor. I asked the receptionist If I could see Mr. Berlin, and play him a few of my songs. Holding back a smile, she says, “I’m sorry, but Mr. Berlin, no longer comes into the office…besides this company only publishes Irving Berlin songs!” This “Brash Brotha’” from the Bronx, smiles and asks, “In that case may I just take a look at his piano?”

She smiles back and says she shouldn’t be doing this…and takes me into the room where he did his writing. This is the instrument, I read about in Life Magazine. Berlin, with no formal training, was only able to play in the key of C. So he had this upright piano made with a “gear shift”, to change keys or modulate with a flick of the wrist! Although I want to sit and play, I don’t want to overstep my bounds, so I just gently and respectfully touched it on my way out.

Now the original “White Christmas” by Bing Crosby, from “Holiday Inn”. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T8swRkzkO2s

BRAND NEW! JAY and THE AMERICANS…”CHRISTMAS IN AMERICA” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r_4l1HCO9oY

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Here’s “Oh Holy Night” by Celine Dion http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Jr-2eyRtV4

Here’s the WHAM classic, “Last Christmas”    http://www.slack-time.com/music-video-1724-Wham-Last-Christmas

HERE’S ALAN O’DAY’S CHRISTMAS CARD AND LATEST VIDEO “EVERYBODY HERE LOVES CHRISTMAS”       

This song comes from first John Lennon album.                                                                                                                                       http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S84RLgnz7Rs

BRAND NEW! Our pal Ron Dante sent over a video from his new “Archie’s Christmas Album”…Archie’s Christmas Party”! It’s the first Christmas album for the cartoon icons. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ht3Xq3Agxx0

m I ever received. My Mother gave it to me along with my first phonograph. It’s “White Christmas” from the Elvis Christmas album which features “White Christmas”. The video footage shows personal home movies of Christmas at Graceland with the King, The Queen (Priscilla) and the Princess (Little Lisa Marie)                              http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-1721952957455893444&q=white+christmas&total=4303&start=30&num=10&so=0&type=search&plindex=0

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How did Whoppy And Streaker know I loved “Do They Know It’s Christmas?” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w5cX_ncZLls&feature=related

JUST ADDED…”OH HOLY NIGHT”, in church last Christmas with American Idols David Archuletta http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xIg5D7aAtic&feature=related

Here’s Nat King Cole singing ,”The Christmas Song”
http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xuqg2_nat-king-cole-the-christmas-song

JUST ADDED! Here’s Paul Evans’ just released animation for his FSA recording, “Santa’s Stuck Up In The Chimney”. Christmas novelty of the year!
The next song, “Rudolf the Rednosed Reindeer”, is one of the best known songs in the world. It was originally the B-side of a Gene Autry record, “If It Doesn’t Snow On Christmas” It was the first 78 I ever owned, a gift from my uncle Mick and aunt Polly…to be played on the new phonograph my mother gave me!

Johnny Marks, the composer of “Rudolf”, as well as “Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree”, was definitely the King of Christmas? The song became so popular, that everytime a reindeer was drawn or painted with a red nose, he would get a royalty! Johnny was a character out of a Damon Runyan story, hair slicked back 40’s style, always nattily dressed, the kind of a guy you’d see at the race track waiting in line at the $100 window. He was quiet and assuming most of the year, but at Christmastime, he’d be in his glory! I remember once in the mid-sixties, during the holiday season , Johnny took my wife and I to lunch at Jack Dempseys’. The restaurant was located right next to the Brill Building and the poor man couldn’t take a bite without one his songwriter or publishing pals coming over to interrupt. Without question he was definitely one of my songwriting heroes! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rFNxZKC1rz0

ORIGINAL CLIP! Elvis from his 1968 special singing, “Blue Christmas”.                                                                       

Mary’s Boy Child” – Boney M
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hxm1FlLSfe4

NOW THE CRYSTALS ” AND “SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO TOWN” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B3zudVvBEB4

Here’s the WHAM classic, “Last Christmas”   

“All Alone on Christmas” – Darlene Love
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NLRKLshPjTw

“All I Want for Christmas is You” – Mariah Carey
“Merry Christmas Everyone” – Shakin’ Stevens
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZeyHl1tQeaQ&ob=av3n
the Jingle Cats and their version of , ”Jingle Bells”                                                                                            http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=4713533704832803716&q=jingle+bells+jingle+cats&hl=en

MAKING OF THE JULLIANNE HOUGH CHRISTMAS ALBUM! Two time grand prize winner of “Dancing With The Stars” who’s enjoying her first #1 country album, has just released her first Christmas CD.http://www.umgnashville.com/artist/media/mediaplayer.aspx?mid=1204&aid=208

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BRAND NEW! ONE OF THE BEST VERSIONS OF “I’LL BE HOME FOR CHRISTMAS” I’VE EVER HEARD! BY THE ONE AND ONLY RASCAL FLATTS http://new.music.yahoo.com/videos/RascalFlatts/I%27ll-Be-Home-For-Christmas–205697487

We interrupt our program for a Christmas message from a twelve year old Michael Jackson. I wish I had a video of him doing a song I wrote with George S. Clinton, Jr. “Little Christmas Tree” from the Classic Motown Christmas album…but I don’t. Here he is with one of my favorites,”I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus” http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-2890892773539045335&q=santa+claus+is+coming+to+town&total=721&start=10&num=10&so=0&type=search&plindex=0

THE SHIRELLES “MAMA MY SOLDIER BOY IS COMIN’ HOME”                                                                                https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2009/12/19/the-shirelles-christmas-song-mama-my-soldier-boys-coming-home/

“Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)” – Darlene Love (live on Letterman, 2005)

Destiny’s Child, “8 Days Of Christmas”                                                                                                                                                    http://www.fanpop.com/spots/christmas/videos/469940

JUST ADDED! OFFICIAL LADY GAGA “CHRISTMAS TREE” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o_36TiPIjVI

“Neil Diamond performing live in 1971 , “Holly Holy”                                                                                                            http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RQwqQwD6OOw

NEW! Here’s “DUETS” with ELVIS PRESLEY, and Carrie Underwood, Martina McBride, LeAnn Rimes, Sara Evans, Gretchen Wilson, Anne Murray, Amy Grant, Karen Fairchild, and Wynonna Judd, in the first Christmas compilation of its kind. Here’s Elvis and Martina McBride with “Blue Christmas” http://blog.cmt.com/2008-11-17/martina-mcbride-duets-with-elvis-presley-for-christmas/

NOW THE CHRISTMAS SONG OF THE YEAR! JUSTIN BIEBER AND “MISTLETOE”

JUST ADDED!MICHAEL BUBLE “ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS YOU” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AB7fEnWyZ1k&feature=related

Here’s U2 and “I Believe In Father Christmas”  http://www.ilike.com/artist/U2/videos

Kenny G and “Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas”                                                                                                                                http://www.ifilm.com/video/2791593

“WHERE ARE YOU CHRISTMAS” BY FAITH HILL http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cSMjgNMdzEI&feature=related

TAYLOR SWIFT “LAST CHRISTMAS” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aQylnK8SoLE&feature=related

THE FINALE OF THE BING CROSBY MOVIE “WHITE CHRISTMAS”

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About ten years ago after inexplicable weakness and episodes of falling down in the street. I checked into UCLA Medical Center for 3 days of test. They kept me for 3 weeks! It was a few days before Christmas, I was in a ward with many who were far worse off than me…and we did our best to keep each others’ spirits up. Somehow, I lost my phone book, and the only numbers that I could remember was my Mothers’, who had moved to West Virginia, and that of my long time friend Alan O’Day, who was on his way out of town.

It’s a policy of most hospitals to send as many patients home for the holidays to be with their family and friends. Soon, I was the only one left in the ward, since I had nowhere else to go. One lonely night, as I sat feeling sorry for myself, I heard a group down the hall, singing Christmas carols. I followed the voices to the the children’s ward…where I heard the joyous sounds of “Jingle Bells”. It was the Salvation Army, passing out toys and candy, and singing to the kids, who were confined to their beds. I joined in on “Silent Night”, “Jingle Bell Rock”, and “Rudolf the Red Nosed Reindeer”, but when they started singing “White Christmas”. Tears started running down my face, and I had to sit in another room to compose myself. This song, written by Irving Berlin, always brings back memories of family and friends in a snow covered New York City…flooding me with emotions.

10 years later, I told Toni Wine (”Candida”,”Groovy Kind Of Love”) I told her the story…and showed her some lyrics I had written that fateful night, “I Lose it When I Hear “White Christmas”. She loved it, but wanted to make the story more universal. Over two writing sessions, which we started on Irving Berlin’s piano, that was given to Toni many years ago, we came up with….

“I LOSE IT WHEN I HEAR “WHITE CHRISTMAS”
words and music by Toni Wine and Artie Wayne

They can play “Jingle Bells” all day
talk about Santa’s Sleigh
I’m alright on a very “Silent Night”
But then my tears begin
when they sing I can’t join in
‘Cause I Lose it When I Hear “White Christmas”

Bein’ without you just ain’t no fun
What kind of thrill is cookin’ for one?
Can’t deny I wanna’ cry myself out
Here’s to Holiday spirit
don’t wanna’ be anywhere near it
‘Cause I Lose it When I Hear “White Christmas”

And Baby I know…You needed to go
But why did you have to leave me now?

[instumental]

Don’t feel like spreading good cheer
Just wanna’ sleep in the New Year
‘Cause I Lose it When I Hear “White Christmas”
‘Cause I Lose it When I Hear “White Christmas”

Copyright 2005-CasmoTwine


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FOR THE REST OF THE 99 VIDEOS CLICK ONTO https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2006/12/22/nookies-top-holiday-video-picks/

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Then click onto THE STORY BEHIND THE MOTOWN CHRISTMAS ALBUM…the classic album that almost never saw the light of day. Diana Ross, The Miracles, The Supremes, The Temptations, The Jackson Five, Stevie Wonder, and Michael Jackson all contributed to one of the greatest Christmas albums of all time, THE MOTOWNCHRISTMAS ALBUM. It is also the story of how George Clinton, Jr. and I wrote “Little Christmas Tree” for Michael Jackson. Read all about it here.

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P.S. CLICK HERE FOR A FREE LAST MINUTE GIF IDEA! https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2008/12/17/great-last-minute-gifs-that-are-absolutely-free/


If you liked WHOPPY AND STREAKER”S 99 CHRISTMAS MUSIC VIDEOS, please feel free to share it with a friend…but if you loved it, please feel free to send it to your entire address book! MERRY CHRISTMAS, HAPPY HANUKKAH, HAPPY KWANZA…ENJOY TO THE WORLD!

From Artie Wayne On The Web

For the Salvation Army http://www.salvationarmyusa.org/usn/www_usn.nsf

Special thanks to Barry Oslander for Whoppy and Streaker’s Christmas bows.

Copyright 2007 by Artie Wayne

BACK TO ARTIE WAYNE ON THE WEB https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/

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First I want to wish you a Happy 4th of July and welcome you all to the first anniversary edition of Artie Wayne On The Web!

Since July 3, 2006, I’ve had over 450, 000 hits on my site thanks to you. I’ve also become a better writer through your support and encouragement, and even co-authored a 25 page booklet, “The Guide To Advanced Blogging with Proven Results!”. Now it’s time for me to finish my book on my adventures in the music business.

I want to thank you for your thousands of e-mails and comments at the bottom of my articles, they have driven me to give you more of what you want. In my book you’ll read the complete stories of what I started in my articles, as well as dozens of new ones!

Many of you were particularly interested in what happened at the end of my 3 brief encounters with Bob Dylan…well here is!

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/05/20/brief-encounters-with-bob-dylan/

Don’t worry, I’ll be back from time to time.

Regards, Artie

P.S. If you scroll down the page you’ll see a Complete Guide To Artie Wayne On The Web. Just look in the URLs for the names and stories that might interest you. This is followed by one of the most important things I’ve ever learned.


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Whoppy and Streaker look back over the past year.

Artie Wayne, a songwriter/ artist/ producer/ publisher and restaurateur. Artie has participated in or been witness to some of the greatest moments in pop music and world history, a subject which he frequently blogs about.

This is the complete guide to Artie Wayne On The Web. If you look in the URLs you’ll find the names and stories that might interest you.

From July 4, 2006 to January 14, 2007
https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/01/14/guide-to-artie-wayne-on-the-web/

From January 15, 2007 to April 6, 2007
https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/04/13/guide-to-best-of-artie-wayne-on-the-web-from-january-15-2007-to-april-6-2007/

From April 7, 2007 to July 3, 2007…Starts below
MOST POPULAR BLOGS


https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2006/10/31/hank-medress-the-unsung-hero-behind-the-lion-sleeps-tonight-hes-so-fine-and-tie-a-yellow-ribbon/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/06/08/brief-encounters-with-clive-davis/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/06/14/driving-around-with-quincy-jones/ 

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/06/06/if-its-on-the-internet-its-gotta-be-true-paris-hilton-goes-down-to-jail/https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/05/20/brief-encounters-with-bob-dylan/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/05/09/if-its-on-the-internet-its-gotta-be-true-shrek-3-kos-spiderman-at-box-office/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/05/06/exclusive-in-1977-i-was-married-to-the-head-of-star-wars-merchandising/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/05/04/congratulations-to-eddie-hodges-actorsingerand-humanitarian/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/04/27/many-brief-encounters-with-neil-bogart/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/04/22/how-voting-was-rigged-on-american-idol-so-sanjaya-would-come-in-last/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/04/20/isnt-it-time-to-turn-the-television-offand-get-back-to-our-senses/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/04/17/you-cant-push-a-bullet-back-into-a-gun-2007

1. BRIEF ENCOUNTERS

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/06/17/brief-encounters-with-a-m-records-herb-alpert-and-jerry-moss/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/06/08/brief-encounters-with-clive-davis/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/06/02/brief-encounters-with-bob-crewe/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/05/20/brief-encounters-with-bob-dylan

2. LITTLE STORIES ON BIG PEOPLE

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/06/23/star-studded-nights-at-genghis-cohen/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/06/14/driving-around-with-quincy-jones/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/06/02/i-sat-with-george-martin-the-night-he-won-four-sgt-pepper-grammys/

3. R.I.P. ROCK IN PERPETUITY

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/06/28/bobby-darin-rip-rock-in-perpetuity/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/06/19/hank-medress-rip-rock-in-perpetuity/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/06/04/shel-silverstein-rip-rock-in-perpetuity/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/05/26/ben-raleigh-rip-rock-in-perpetuity/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/04/27/many-brief-encounters-with-neil-bogart/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/04/22/van-mccoy-rip-rock-in-perpetuity/

5. “IF IT’S ON THE INTERNET, IT’S GOTTA’ BE TRUE!’

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/06/25/if-its-on-the-internet-its-gotta-be-true-die-hard-4-tops-bo-buries-competition/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/06/20/if-its-on-the-internet-its-gotta-be-true-angelina-jolie-and-the-naked-truth/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/06/12/if-its-on-the-internet-its-gotta-be-true-what-paris-said-to-barbara-walters/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/06/06/if-its-on-the-internet-its-gotta-be-true-paris-hilton-goes-down-to-jail/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/05/30/if-its-on-the-internet-its-gotta-be-true-lindsay-sniffs-paris-strips-rosie-flips/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/05/23/if-its-on-the-internet-its-gotta-be-true-pirates-3-tops-bo-sinks-competition/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/05/16/if-its-on-the-internet-its-gotta-be-true-peoples-first-skank-of-the-week/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/05/09/if-its-on-the-internet-its-gotta-be-true-shrek-3-kos-spiderman-at-box-office/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/05/02/if-its-on-the-internet-its-gotta-be-true-exclusive-paris-blows-it-in-court/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/04/28/if-its-on-the-internet-its-gotta-be-true-first-photo-sanjaya-shaves-his-head/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/04/25/if-its-on-the-internet-its-gotta-be-true-startling-discovery-made-on-al-gores-lawn/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/04/18/if-its-on-the-internet-its-gotta-be-true-girls-gone-wild-ceo-breaks-out-of-jail/

6. ADVANCED BLOGGING https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/06/21/exclusive-advanced-blogging-secrets-blogging-help-with-amazing-results/

7. SPECIAL EXCLUSIVES
https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/06/16/exclusive-star-trekrodenberrys-box-michael-piller-chapt-2-download-now/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/05/03/get-refund-now-time-warner-av-out-of-sync-truth-revealed/

8. STORY BEHIND THE SONG
https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/06/30/more-stories-behind-the-songs/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/06/30/the-story-of-meet-me-at-midnight-mary/

9. ESSAYS
https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/04/20/isnt-it-time-to-turn-the-television-offand-get-back-to-our-senses/

10. PSYCHIC AND SPIRITUAL
https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/07/02/most-important-thing-ive-learned-on-earth-positive-thinking-brings-results-i-desire/

10. TOP LISTS
https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/04/30/arties-top-music-videos-of-the-month/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/05/27/arties-top-music-videos-of-the-month-2/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/06/21/arties-top-music-videos-of-the-month-3/11.

11. MUSIC AND LYRICS
https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/05/25/chris-daughtry-the-true-american-idol-exclusive-videos-as-seen-only-on-mtv/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/05/14/nickelback-video-if-everyone-cared-and-the-return-to-relavance/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/05/12/remember-mamas-behind-you/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/04/17/you-cant-push-a-bullet-back-into-a-gun-2007/

12. QUOTES WORTH REMEMBERING
https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/06/10/even-more-quotes-worth-remembering/

https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/05/18/a-few-more-quotes-worth-remembering/

Copyright 2007 by Artie Wayne

My website http://artiewayne.com

Back to Artie Wayne On The Web https://artiewayne.wordpress.com

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In 1973, I accompanied one of our Warner Brothers staff songwriters, George Clinton Jr. (who went on write the score for three “Austin Powers” movies), to the Tokyo Music Festival. It was my first trip to Japan, and I was impressed how well organized the large masses of people were. Over the years my heavy workload, beautiful women and other excesses used up too much time and too many emotions. I knew I had to find a way to learn how to really focus.

When I got back to the states, I decided to look into deep relaxation techniques. I went to see my Chiropractor and friend, Dr. Floyd Taylor who had developed remarkable physical, mental and spiritual methods of healing after his plane was shot down in World War Two. Over time, and through much pain, he was able to correct his bone structure and musculature, which left him bent over and unable to walk. His super-posture and confident stride was proof positive that his methods work. He not only told me that deep relaxation techniques could help attain my goal to focus, it could help the severe back pain I suffered from congenital scoliosis. He said I could learn to go below the pain level and function better. He also mysteriously hinted that the deeper I went, the more “things” I would discover.

My equally adventuresome friend, Patti Dahlstrom (who introduced me to Dr.Taylor), was just as fascinated with the possibilities of these deep relaxation techniques as I was. We both took private lessons from Dr. Taylor’s friend, Henry Mundt.

I was helped immediately by what he taught me especially “ The 2-2-5 “ a simple breathing exercise that I continue to use everyday when I need to calm down.

When I wanted to go deeper…Here are the simple steps Hank Mundt taught me.

First…in a quiet, semi-darkened room with your eyes closed, lie down on your back on a bed or a couch or sit up in a straight chair with your feet flat on the floor, palms upward.

1. (Inhale) hold your breath for a count of Two………1…………….2………….(Exhale)

(Inhale) hold your breath for a count of Two………1…………….2………….(Exhale)

(Inhale) this time hold your breath for a count of Five
1………….2………..3…………4…………5………(Exhale)

2. Repeat this sequence called the 2-2-5 again

(Inhale) hold your breath for a count of Two………1…………….2………….(Exhale)

(Inhale) hold your breath for a count of Two………1…………….2………….(Exhale)

(Inhale) this time hold your breath for a count of Five
1………….2………..3…………4…………5……….(Exhale)

3. Visualize a flight of stairs and starting at the number 100, count backwards slowly to the number 1, seeing each number as you descend…100……………..99………………98……………etc.

4. When you reach the bottom, say over and over,”Positive thinking brings results I desire. Positive thinking brings results I desire.” You feel more and more relaxed as you visualize what you want to accomplish. “Positive thinking brings results I desire”…”Positive thinking brings results I desire”

5. Once you’ve repeated it ten times, visualize taking an elevator up to the place where you started

6. You feel relaxed and refreshed…ready to take on the world.

IT’S BEEN PROVEN THAT PETTING AN ANIMAL RELIEVES STRESS AND PROMOTES HEALING IN HUMANS. I JUST DISCOVERED THAT LOOKING AT THIS ANIMATED GIF OF THESE PARAKEETS FOR 60 SECONDS DOES THE SAME THING!

Copyright 2012 by Artie Wayne

WHILE FIGHTING LARGE CORPORATIONS WHO ARE TRYING TO KEEP ROYALTIES AWAY ME AND THOUSANDS OF OTHER ARTISTS, SONGWRITERS AND PUBLISHERSMY ONLY SOURCE OF INCOME IS FROM THE SALE OF MY BOOK. ” I DID IT FOR A SONG”, WITH OVER 100 STORIES FROM THE MUSIC BUSINESS OF THE ’60s, ’70s, and ’80s. I HOPE YOU’LL CONSIDER BUYING ONE DIRECTLY FROM ME THROUGH PAYPAL FOR ONLY $9.99 AT  artiewayne@gmail.com OR BY CHECK TO…ARTIE WAYNE  P.O. BOX 1105, DESERT HOT SPRINGS, CALIFORNIA 92240

THANKS AND REGARDS, ARTIE WAYNE https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2012/04/10/celebrating-two-million-views-today-on-artie-wayne-on-the-web/

 

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In the early 60’s, I went out with a few Iranian girls who actually told me that they were brought up to tell people what they wanted to hear, then go out and do the exact opposite. One of these girls, Jamela, was the beautiful daughter of a deposed general, who was exiled to the United States along with the Shah of Iran. I admit it was exciting to wonder who was following us on our dates, her father’s bodyguards…or the Secret Service! All of this danger, brought us closer together, and she revealed many aspects of her culture I never knew about. She told me that Iranian men showed no quarter to their enemy and were fierce warriors because they weren’t afraid of dying! It was only when she told me that she feared for my safety, did I take our cultural differences seriously! We continued to see each other secretly, however, which led me to co-write my first hit song, ” ( Meet Me At) Midnight Mary” (Raleigh/ Wayne).

Ben Raleigh (“Wonderful, Wonderful”, “Tell Laura I Love Her”) came up with the title, and we wrote it in a couple of hours. The next day we took it up to Larry Taylor at Bourne music, who gave us an advance and gave us money for a demo. For the next year, the publishers weren’t able to get the song recorded, then we were told that a new artist on Capitol records, Jerry Cole, had just cut it.

Although his record was good, I thought I could produce a better one. I had become good friends with one of my co-writers, Joey Powers, who had just been released from an RCA recording contract. We decided to go into the studio to do another demo good enough to become a master. We scrapped up $500.00, booked Associated recording studios, hired arranger Al Gorgoni and Charlie Macey to play guitars, Buddy Saltzman on drums and Jeannie Thomas who sang all the background parts.

The following week, “Midnight Mary”was turned down by every major record label in New York City! I remember playing it for my friends song plugger, Jerry Landis (Soon to become better known as Paul Simon) up at E.B.Marks music and Tony Dee, who was a promotion man for the company. They both suggested that I take my master up to Larry Uttal who had started running AMY Records. Larry, who was my former neighbor at 1650 Broadway, loved the record gave us our production costs back as well as a shitty percentage!

I remember as we signed contracts he asked me if I could make the bass on the master a little bit louder? I just looked at him and said, “What bass?” Larry smiled and handed me an extra $15 out of his pocket to add a bass and do a new mix.

$15 ? for a bass player And a new mix? Fortunately I had a few friends who did me some favors, including bass player, Russ Savakis. After the session I took the $15 and bought everyone hot dogs and some coconut champagne at a store around the corner from the Brill building.

A few months later, I remember taking publicity pictures and being handed a gold record by Larry Uttal, who whispered, “Now this doesn’t necessarily mean it sold a million records!”

It was November 22, 1963 and I had been preparing to record the entire “Midnight Mary” album during the four day weekend. I’d been flying to Columbus, Ohio every week to rehearse Joey Powers, who was going for his Masters Degree at Ohio State.

That night, as Al Gorgoni put some finishing touches on the arrangements, and Jeannie Thomas polished the background parts for her and Lettie Hamblet. Our usual crew of musicians, augmented with Paul Simon and Roger McGuinn on 12 string guitars, was going over the charts for the first session, due to start in a half-hour.

Joey Powers and I were riding into the city from the airport, when we heard the horrible, unconfirmed reports on the news. By the time we walked into the studio and saw the tears in most everybody’s eyes, we knew it was true, “President Kennedy had been shot!”

(To Be Continued)

Copyright 2007 by Artie Wayne

EXTRA! EXTRA! YOU CAN BUY MY BOOK ,“I DID IT FOR A SONG” AT AMAZON or Barnes & Noble or from Smashwords

TO READ A CHAPTER OR TWO FOR FREE CLICK  HERE

TO READ SOME OF THE COMMENTS  CLICK  HERE

BACK TO ARTIE WAYNE ON THE WEB! https://artiewayne.wordpress.com  

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Until I joined Spectropop, The 60’s music forum, I largely dismissed my early body of work, which included hundreds of releases as a writer/ artist/ and producer, because most of them weren’t hits.

Now through all of your eyes, I’ve re-examined some of my own songs and realized a lot of them didn’t suck after all!

Here are 2 songs from the past…followed by three songs I’ve written recently.

FROM THE INSIDE”

Whenever a line or idea came to me, seemingly, out of the blue I considered it a gift. It was only during times of great emotional stress, however, when I channeled entire songs. The next time this happened was when my Grandmother passed away in 1974.

When I heard the news, I flew back to New York from Hollywood, where I was general manager of Warner Brothers Music. Although for the past few years I had been concentrating on promoting other people’s songs … now I was compelled to write again.

During the three-day period, from the time she passed until her funeral …Gooma came to me in my darkened hotel room several times. She talked to me in her usual comforting tone… told me not to cry or be afraid. She smiled and said I should be happy for her…that she was finally out of pain.

She didn’t look like the 83 year old that I revered…but like the thirty year old, whose picture lived in the family album. She sat across from me slightly illuminated by what seemed to be a light coming from within. She told me that we all have guides from the other side who anonymously give us information everyday…but from now on she would be my personal guide.

To hear “From The Inside” and the original demo by Kim Carnes http://artiewayne.com/inside.html

“SENDING MY GOOD THOUGHTS TO YOU”

One of my closest friends, Patti Dahlstrom, introduced me to one of her closest friends, Jim Croce and we hit it off immediately. We went to his concerts, TV shows and sometimes we just sat around talking or playing guitar. Although I was more of a publisher at the time, working for Warner Bros. Music, I knew I was in the presence of an extraordinary human being and could learn a great from him about songwriting and life.

The night his plane crashed, Patti and I had started a song that became a tribute to him “Sending my Good Thoughts to You”. Since his passing, whenever I’ve been stuck on a lyric or need a little help with one of life’s little problems Jim appears to me and gives me an answer, usually laced with his “wicked” sense of humor.

To hear Patti Dahlstrom sing “Sending My Good Thoughts To You”
http://artiewayne.com/sending.html

“THERE’S A CRACK IN A STAR ON HOLLYWOOD BOULEVARD”

Once upon a time a publicist would warn their female clients not to be photographed exiting a car if they weren’t wearing underwear, now they warn them not to be photographed like that unless they shave! We’re living in an era where publicists rule and manipulate our perceptions…where spin is King!

To hear Ariel Wolf sing, “Crack In A Star On Hollywood Boulevard.
https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2006/08/12/theres-a-crack-in-a-star-on-hollywood-boulevard/

“(DON”T WANT TO BE) INVISIBLE”

Ever since I was a kid I’ve known people who have tried to keep a low profile…so low in fact, they are virtually invisible! I’ve never been one of those people. With every ounce of strength and determination in my body, I fight everyday to make my mark in this world, while carving a pathway to the next. I’d like to present a song I wrote with Terry Mace, about this struggle…and the effect love can have on it. I hope you enjoy it! Just click onto

To hear Terry Mace sing, “Invisible”
http://artiewayne.com/invisible.html

“I’M AT MY BEST WHEN I”M DOWN”

Since I’m no longer able to play a musical instrument, I put down an acapella version of “I’m At My Best When I’m Down” on my computer. I sent it to my friend Alan O’Day ( “Undercover Angel”, “Angie Baby”), who surprised me by putting chords behind it!
http://artiewayne.com/best.html

Copyright 2007 by Artie Wayne
For Spectropop http://spectropop.com

To reach Alan O’Day http://alanoday.com

Artie Wayne website http://artiewayne.com