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Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton on top of Britney Spears!

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When Britney Spears, Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan hang out together, And separately, can the devil be far behind? Men who once stared at women’s breasts during a coversation, finally have another place to look! Last week, on “The View”, Rosie O’Donnell, held up a pair of tiny red panties she supposedly bought Britney. This gave her an excuse to hold up her own huge “Granny Panties”, it might have made the audience laugh…but I’m sure it made all the men who were watching shrivel up in horror!

Now that a video of Michael Richards in blackface has surfaced, how are his “Spin Doctors” going to handle that? Are they going to call it a “Tribute” to Stepin’ Fetchit? What is frightning about this are some of the comments made by the thousands of people who have seen it over the last few days! Click onto http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DVt6eoKB9sw&eurl=

The Sunday morning political talk shows had quite a few Democrats recently “emboldened” by the mid-term elections, who sound as delusional as the current administration does! What it comes down to is, everybody wants to get out of Iraq but nobody knows quite how to do it! I’m sure that our ( I mean their, ) Prime Minister will be urged to make a premature statement that Iraq is ready to govern itself, and get America off the hook. I just hope we leave a few troops and enough nukes to thwart those who are eager to make a “Shish-ka-bomb” or a “Korean Bar-B-Que” out of all of us!

As far as the Iranians go, we should be afraid…very afraid! In my youth I went out with a few Iranian girls who actually told me that they were brought up to tell people what they wanted to hear, then go out and do the exact opposite. One of these girls was the beautiful daughter of a deposed general, who was exiled to the United States along with the Shah of Iran. I admit it was exciting to wonder who was following us on our dates, her father’s bodyguards…or the Secret Service! All of this danger, brought us closer together, and she revealed many aspects of her culture I never knew about. She told me that Iranian men showed no quarter to their enemy and were fierce warriors because they weren’t afraid of dying! It was only when she told me that she feared for my safety, did I take our cultural differences seriously! We continued to see each other secretly, which led me to co-write my first hit song, ” ( Meet Me At) Midnight Mary” (Raleigh/ Wayne). I lost touch with her after she ran off with some Cuban Freedom Fighter!

I’ll tell ya’, It’s becoming harder and harder to avoid politics, when we can almost hear God whispering to the Earth, “Your 15 minutes are up!” What’s really scary is the possibility of Hilary Clinton actually becoming President…I would only feel confident if she chose Danny DeVito as her running mate! At least we’d have a few laughs before we all had to “Duck and Cover”!

Copyright 2006 by Artie Wayne

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EXTRA! EXTRA! EXCLUSIVE PHOTOS KRISTEN BELL BLOWS!
https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2006/11/12/it-was-women-and-children-firstthe-day-the-bubblegum-bubble-burst/ 

EXCLUSIVE! Lindsay Sniffs, Paris Strips, Rosie flips! https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/05/30/if-its-on-the-internet-its-gotta-be-true-lindsay-sniffs-paris-strips-rosie-flips/

FLASH!!! Lindsay Lohan Voted People’s “Skank Of The Week!
https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/05/16/if-its-on-the-internet-its-gotta-be-true-peoples-first-skank-of-the-week/

NEW EXCLUSIVE!- BALD BRITNEY ARRESTED AT LAX! https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2007/02/19/if-its-on-the-internet-its-gotta-be-true-excusive-bald-britney-arrested-at-airport/

Exclusive photo! “Triple Breasted Beauty!” https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2006/12/26/if-its-on-the-internet-its-gotta-be-true-triple-breasted-beauty-photo-exclusive/

See what Britney saw, the uncensored video of Justin Timberlake’s Dick In A Box! https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2006/12/20/if-its-on-the-internetits-gotta-be-true-plus-justin-timberlakes-dick-in-a-box/

Shocking NEW Photo – Is This Really Britney Spears Pussy? Click onto https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/2006/12/13/if-its-on-the-internetits-gotta-be-true-is-this-really-britney-spears-pussy/


Once upon a time a publicist would warn their female clients not to be photographed exiting a car if they weren’t wearing underwear…now they warn them not to be photographed like that unless they shave! We’re living in an era where publicists rule and manipulate our perceptions…usually without us ever knowing it.

Look what happened when Tom Cruise terminated his long time public relations Ace, Pat Kingsley and hired his sister. The wall that had carefully been created around him quickly started to erode, and we saw Tom for the first time in all of his Scientological glory!

Now I have to hand it to Michael Richards for hiring publicist Howard Rubenstein, who has deep ties in the black community, to get him off the hook for using the “N” word against hecklers. Now the ball has been picked up by Rev. Al Sharpton and Rev. Jesse Jackson, who have forgiven Richards and consider his actions just a symptom of a larger social sickness in America. Last week the three unlikely compadres and African- American Congresswoman Maxine Waters called for the word Nigger never to be used again by rappers, filmakers and comedians!

That’s obviously a great idea, pioneered in the 60s by comedian Lenny Bruce in a routine that trivialized the word. A similar concept was embraced and promoted in the 70s by Richard Pryor after a trip to Africa, where he experienced Black pride for the first time. Wait a second…Michael Richards, suddenly is no longer on the hot seat and has become somewhat of a hero! Has he repented enough, or should his skin be chemically darkened then made to live in a Harlem project for a year as penance for his rant? What about the publicist, Howard Rubenstein, who came up with this brilliant scheme? I think he should go to Washington and made chief of staff and paint pretty pictures for us, until we all figure out what’s going on!

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2011 by Artie Wayne https://artiewayne.wordpress.com/about-artie-wayne/

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